You can create the life you want
Many clients, friends and connections all around the world are telling me how they’re painfully realizing that they’re not as happy as they thought they were.
Choices that made sense a few years earlier now seem just plain wrong, as if someone else had decided for them. Some even admitted they never took the time to reflect on what they really wanted and just let life happen to them.
Read also: “Your choices determine your life”
This year, forced to work from home and be 24/7 with their partners and children many started questioning the direction of their own life, career and relationships.
It takes a lot of courage to look at yourself in the mirror and admit you don’t really like (anymore) what you worked so hard to create. As painful as this moment of awareness can be it can also lead to a newfound sense of commitment. The commitment to rebuild or create the life you want.
But how can you do that? How can you trust this time you will make the right calls? And what if you don’t want to throw it all away, but just tweak a couple of things here and there? How do you start changing things around?
1 – Know what you stand for
Very often the reason why people find themselves stuck in a life (or job, or relationship) they don’t like is they don’t know what they stand for.
They don’t know what truly matters to them, what they believe in and what is essential for them to feel satisfied. Simply put, they don’t know their core values.
Knowing your core values is the first step to make choices that will allow you to have a fulfilling life. If you’ve never taken the time to ask yourself what you believe in or what you need in order to feel happy you’ve probably just lived on autopilot.
Then one day you wake up during a pandemic (or any other type of crisis) and you wonder why the hell you chose that career or why you’re living in a big city when you hate traffic and crowds.
Read also: “What’s your life purpose?”
2 – Envision the life you wish to live
Whatever your goal is, you need to envision how your life will be once you reach it.
The more clearly you can imagine it, describe it and “feel” it, the easier it will be for you to work towards it.
For example, if you wish to improve the relationship with your partner, you need to envision how you would like it to be. How would your days together be? How would you talk to each other? How would it be different from how it used to be before?
If you want to change career, you need to envision how your new job will be. What exactly will you do? What will you not do anymore? Which skills will you use? How much will you earn?
Get my free guide “Turn your passion into a business in 3 easy steps”
Being specific is the key to create the changes that you want. If you don’t what you’re looking for, how can you even find it?
3 – Overcome inner resistance
Your mind can be either your ally or your worst enemy. What you believe to be possible for you (and for others) or not depends on your personal experience. Your own idea of the world and of life itself is based on all the beliefs and opinions you have accumulated over the years.
This is how you see things and how you see them determines your choices and your actions. The problem is you may not be fully aware that some of your beliefs are limiting you instead of empowering you.
Overcoming your inner resistance by yourself isn’t easy, this is why so many people work with coaches to achieve their goals. Many of my clients come to me because no matter how hard they try to change things in their lives they can’t get past their own limiting beliefs.
4 – Set clear goals
Sounds easy right?
You want to get in shape, or you want to start a business, or move somewhere else.
OK, but what exactly do you mean by “getting in shape”? How many kilos or pounds do you want to lose? By when? And how are you going to do that? Diet? Which one? Exercise? What kind? How often?
Ok, I think I made my point now! I don’t think I need to go through the other examples!
The clearer and more detailed your goals and “action plans” to achieve them are, the easier it will be for you to get the results you want.
5 – Act!
You may think it’s obvious, but you have no idea how many people never really do that!
They dream, they talk, they read books or watch videos about all the things they want to do or change, but they never act!
Taking action can be scary sometimes, but it’s the only way to move forward and to experience progress and growth.
When you stop dreaming and start doing you get feedbacks from reality and those feedback show you what works or not and how your ideas and decisions are helping you changing or improving your life.
In the end, you learn a lot more by making a mistake than by doing absolutely nothing.
I know changing can be difficult, especially when we want to change ourselves, but it’s always possible!
You just need to accept that it will take time, patience and discipline.
If you’re longing for some change in your life or are undergoing a major transition or transformation, I can help you get to the other side safely and happily!
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This is what some of my clients say about me. Thank you!
Going on a coaching path with Chiara was incredibly stimulating and regenerating in a delicate phase of my professional life in which I had to question my work and redefine my future career goals. Chiara’s uniqueness as a coach, in addition to being extremely professional, lies in her extraordinary empathy and her ability to establish a relationship of trust with her clients. Chiara is a coach and an authentic professional and was able to transmit passion, courage and motivation to me thanks to a pragmatic approach, focused on practical steps that are never an end in themselves. Thanks to her, I had the opportunity to focus on my future professional goals and create a plan for their effective realization. Chiara has always been genuinely interested in my growth and has really helped me understand how to be a resource for myself and not an obstacle. His questions opened me to new ideas and perspectives and charged me with a new creative energy.
I would recommend Chiara as a coach to acquaintances and not just for the uniqueness of her approach, empathic and authentic, and her genuine interest in the personal fulfillment of her clients, qualities that are difficult to find in such fast professional contexts in which the human aspect is relational often takes a back seat. Heartfelt thanks Chiara for this journey and for opening my eyes.
“Working with Chiara has been a revealing experience. I had the chance to uncover sides of myself I had never considered before and I also worked on my own potential, which I had been unable to recognize, because I was clouded by negative thoughts.
I never felt judged, and I could talk freely about what was making feel confused. Chiara was also very patient and available even in between sessions if I wanted to reach out to her. Something worth noting is her flexible approach, meaning that she was able to understand what I needed in each moment and therefore to adapt to it.
When I started the sessions, I was deeply confused about various aspects of my life. The first goal was getting some clarity, then we started working towards the goals that emerged during the sessions. I’m glad I manage to unravel those intricated thoughts that had been with me for a while and I also feel full of energy, because I have goals to achieve.
I definitely recommend Chiara, simply because I got so many benefits, some of which become evident even at the end of the program. “
“Working with Chiara has been a stimulating and enriching experience. Chiara has been a valuable ally during a transition, fully present even in between sessions.
I really appreciated being able to work on what was coming up in the moment, without forcing things, yet remaining goal oriented.
As a result of working with Chiara I gained a clearer perspective over what I was going through and what I had to let go; I took a break, processed the end of a phase in my life and started over with renewed awareness.
Chiara is open and transparent, she helped me see things from a distance and explore what needed to be healed. Anyone would benefit from working with her and I highly recommend her to all those who tend to challenge themselves. Coaching is for you if you want to take your own personal development to a new level.”
“Chiara is a truly exceptional coach!
Working with her feels like sitting with a good friend and having a heart- felt conversation.
She helped me prepare for my TEDx talk and better understand my “why”.
After each session, I not only got valuable takeaways, but also felt uplifted and motivated to take concrete actions.
Her questions opened my eyes to new possibilities and ideas and her guidance and feedbacks helped me structure my TEDx talk into an informative, inspiring and entertaining narrative.
I’ve already recommended Chiara to my friends, because even in this global economy world, it’s hard to find a good coach, who genuinely cares about you and seeks to provide values before
“Chiara holds a warm, welcoming presence. She has a lovely smile and clean energy.
I appreciated how she was responsive to what came up for me in each session.
She always held up a supportive space for me to process my emotions and find my own answers, without pressuring me with an agenda or goals. This made feel safe and helped me open up.
Definitely recommend Chiara, she’s a lovely coach!”
“When I worked with Chiara I felt relaxed, open to talk, it felt as if we had known each other for
a long time!
I liked her energy, so friendly, so calm, so supportive and her voice and smile too!
Thanks to her coaching I solved some personal and professional issues, I gained a lot of insights
and above all, I feel like I gained a friend and coach I can go back to anytime in my life.
Of course I recommend her! Always and to everybody!”
“Working with Chiara was very pleasant, she’s very kind and helpful.
I liked her professional style, the way she related to me, how she truly helps with your personal growth without being intrusive, the way she’s able to take you to your final goal by asking you the right questions.
Thanks to her coaching, I learnt to organize my workday more efficiently, optimizing the way I use the available time.
I’ve become more aware of my own professional skills and abilities, which led me to be more self-reliant and independent and I learnt to work in a goal-oriented way. Being coached by Chiara was really helpful to me, so I definitely recommend her because I know she can help anyone else reaching their goals.”
“My experience with Chiara was great!
She’s able to create a very nice atmosphere where you feel so well and at ease!
She’s a very good listener and she asks you these very powerful questions that help you get unstuck and move on in a positive way.
Working with Chiara made me feel much better, I gained more clarity on what I had to do next and how I could do it, which led me to “feel” and then reach my goals.
I definitely recommend her!”